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Jodi's Schoolhouse

GoodBlock: Conflict Has a Winner

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Conflict Has a Winner
Case 1 / 7
Jodi, neutral
Hey there. Come sit down a minute.
Case 1

Conflict Has a Winner

Five arguments, one person. Theo is right in some of them and wrong in one, and in every single one the question isn't who wins — it's whether there was another way through that nobody went looking for.

Theo

Twelve. Sure of himself, most of the time. Here for all five.

Case 2

The Unspoken Need

Two people, two topics, both dug in. Neither has said what they're actually worried about.

Case 3

The Cost of Being Right

He's right. Actually right. Watch what that's worth four messages later.

Case 4

The Apology That Isn't Great

It's got the word in it. That's about all it's got.

Case 5

Both of Them Want You

Two friends, one fight, and both of them want him to say they're right.

Case 6

When You're the One Who's Wrong

He knows. He's still arguing. The price goes up while he decides.

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Case 2

The Unspoken Need

Group project, three weeks, two people. Theo and Sam want different topics, and both of them have stopped listening. Two positions are on the table. Neither one is the actual problem.

1Under each position are three guesses at what that person actually needs. Only one per person is a real need — the other two are the same position in softer words. Pick one for each.
0 of 2 needs found

Theo's position

"We're doing space exploration. I already know loads about it."

What does he actually need?

Sam's position

"We're doing ocean pollution. It's the one that actually matters."

What does she actually need?

"Positions collide. Needs usually don't. Somebody just has to ask the second question."
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Case 3

The Cost of Being Right

Project group chat, six people. Jonah has just told everyone Theo's wrong about the trip form deadline. Theo has the form in front of him. It says Friday. Theo is right.

1Four rounds. Each one, pick Theo's reply: escalate, hold and restate, or leave the thread. Two meters underneath. One of them is not going to move.
Round 1 of 4
Is Theo right?100%

This one is not going to move.

Is this working?100%

This one is.

Project group — 6 peoplelive
"Being right is a fact. Being effective is a choice. They're not the same button."
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Case 4

The Apology That Isn't Great

Ravi told three people something Theo had told him privately — that he'd failed the swim test. Theo found out. He was upset, and said so. A day later, this arrived.

1Audit it. Four things a real apology has. Mark each one present or missing — the answer's in the words, not in how it feels.
0 of 4 checked

Ravi — 9:12 PM

ok I'm sorry you took it that way, can we drop it
"A full apology can't be extracted. It has to be offered. What you can do is name the one piece that's missing."
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Case 5

Both of Them Want You

Amira and Jess fell out in the group chat on Sunday. Both of them are Theo's friends. Both of them have messaged him separately, and both of them want the same thing.

1Open both threads and read them before he answers anyone. Each has three replies. There's a fourth card underneath that isn't ready yet.
0 of 2 threads read

…something else?

Read both threads first.

"Sitting on the fence is having no opinion. Declining to be the judge is having one, and keeping it."
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Case 6

When You're the One Who's Wrong

Theo has been telling Nia that movie night is Saturday. Three messages in, she sends the screenshot. It says Friday. He's read it. He knows.

1Each turn, pick for Theo: concede, deflect, or double down. Conceding is always on the table. The price of it goes up every turn he doesn't.
Turn 1
Cost to concede right noweasy
Nia · Theo · Ellisgroup chat
"Conceding isn't losing the argument. It's ending it — and being the reason it ended."
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Case 7

Before You Go

How was this one?

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